Final Script Draft

Bench Setting.

I wanted to find the right bench in town for the part of my film including my male actor, I decided to take some photo's and see which one best matched the description of the scene i'm trying to create.

Picture No1

Picture No2

Picture No3

Picture No4

Picture No5

By looking at the picture as a whole I have come to the conclusion that Picture No3 + No4 would compliment the connotations of the film well, the church in the background provides a rural theme as well as a sense of mystery. Pictures No1 + No 2 are adequate but do not really embody the feel of the film by having a shop that belongs to a large chain operating behind the benches. Picture No5 also has a sense of city life more than quiet somerset life by having graffiti and high walls in the background.

FINAL OPTIONS

Work Setting

I need to find the right building to use as the 'workplace' in the script, I have three options so I took my digital camera out with me to take some photo's of the exterior to try and help distinguish which one would best suit my film.

The Hawthorns

The Co-Operative

The Crown

I want my short film to have a sense of realism and as it set in Somerset I want the work place to have a rural appearance instead of a large corporate label such as 'Co-op' and after speaking to the owners of the businesses I figured 'Hawthorns' was my first choice as it is a privately owned, family run business with a lot of history to the building making it a perfect candidate for the workplace I will use in my film.

Home Settings

I need to find the correct locations for the two houses I will be using in my production so I have taken a few stills of the houses I have to utilize to help figure out which house will best suit the scenes.

8 Windmill Hill Rd

No71 Benedict Street

High Street Setting

I need to find the right area for the High Street setting for my film, I realistically have two options for this setting either my hometown Glastonbury or a close by village called Street.I decided to take my digital camera out with me and take some stills of each of them to give me a chance to analyse each setting and make an educated decision on which one would be more appropriate.

GLASTONBURY
High Street

STREET 

High street

After comparing the two I think Glastonbury would have a better effect, it has a more rural effect and is more of a tourist attraction than a shopping center like unlike Street. Glastonbury High Street is also where I got the inspiration for my film so I feel its important to include it in the shoot.

Actors

Alun Thurston

Alun has studied with Circomedia, a circus college that concentrates on performing arts including acting, He seems perfect for the part of my film as he has already had experience with student films before as well as studying media studies in Strode College for a year.

This is one of the films Alun has been cast in, it shows his ability to hold a neutral or blank expression that I will need him to embody with my film.

Yasmin Jones

(Left)

Yasmin Jones has almost finished her last year of a Level 3 National diploma Performing arts BTEC in the performing arts college Strode College, A fine young capable woman Yasmin is very likely to do well in this character as parts of her personality relate to the character she will be asked to embody.

Daisy Rendell

(Middle)

Daisy Rendall is also studying a Level 3 National diploma Performing arts BTEC and is doing well in all her classes, she should also be able to make a smooth transisition into the character as her and my character also have many similarities in their personality.

Edited Script

I edited my script whilst converting it into a story board, many scenes and shots have been cut, edited and arranged differently to suit the storyboard which you can see in these pictures.



Story Board

I I used the weekend to some up with my storyboard and after running the story and script by my teacher, making a few changes etc I have finally completed it.

First Script Draft

This is how far I have come with my first draft of the script so far and will be running it through with my teacher later on today..

EXT: HIGH STREET – MORNING

Yasmin hurrying downhill with bag by her side, looking both ways before crossing.

CUT TO:

Opening credits showing title.

CUT TO:

EXT: FRONT DOOR OF HOUSE - MORNING

Yasmin knocking on door erratically and checking watch, looking flustered. She opens door and enters the house.

CUT TO

INT: HOUSE - MORNING

YASMIN: Come on Daisy! Its 5 to 9 we can’t be late again! You know what she’s like.

DAISY: Alright, alright, I can’t find my other shoe! I can’t go to work in one bloody shoe!

YASMIN: Oh Daisy, why are you wearing those ones anyway? They’re hardly practical for work.

Daisy manages to find other shoe and sits at the bottom of the stairs proceeding to put it on...

DAISY: Oh fine, maybe you’re right. Where did I put my boots?

Daisy turns around to walk upstairs to get a different pair of shoes...

YASMIN: No No! Those ones are fine! Let’s go.

DAISY: Alright, come on then, is my hair okay?

Daisy attempts to check hair in mirror

YASMIN: Get out.

Pushes Daisy out the door as she her watch.

CUT TO

EXT: HIGHSTREET - MORNING

YASMIN: How was your weekend did you go Motion?

DAISY: Nah, Rosie backed out at the last minute.

YASMIN: Oh well apparently is wasn’t that good anyway, Luke said  it was a bit overcrowded.

DAISY: I guess, its just good to get out of this town occasionally.

                Hey who’s that? He looks a bit odd doesn’t he.

Daisy points over at a strange looking man sitting on bench staring off into space.

YASMIN: Don’t point! It’s just some guy; now he’s gunna know we’re talking about him.

DAISY: I don’t think so look he’s just staring off into space.

YASMIN: He looks a bit sad, try not to stare at him, I feel quite bad for him.

DAISY: Yeah but look at him he looks well odd, i mean whats he doing?

YASMIN: He’s probably just waiting for someone, don’t be so nosy.

Yasmin taps Daisy gently on the shoulder.

DAISY: Touchy, if you love him so much why don’t you just go over and talk to him.

Daisy switches places with Yas and pushes her towards the pavement.

YASMIN: I do not LOVE him!

Yasmin playfully pushes Daisy away.

DAISY: He does look proper weird though; maybe he’s escaped from that mental institute in Wells! Maybe he’s gone AWOL or something!

YASMIN: Oh Daisy, You always jump to conclusions you’re such a drama queen.

DAISY: I wonder how long he’s gunna be there for, it’s freezing out here.

YASMIN: I know, but hey maybe He’s got a bus to catch or something.

CUT TO:

INT: HAWTHORNS HOTEL - MORNING

DAISY: Hey Yas have you seen Ellie recently?

YASMIN: Yeah, shes still dating that creepy guy, Can you believe he’s twelve years older than her?.

DAISY: Didn’t you hear about the tattoo?

YASMIN: Oh please tell me she didn’t!

DAISY: Yep, She’s got his name tattooed in big letters across her back!

YASMIN: What? You can’t be serious? That’s... That’s...

EILEEN: (Calls out from the Kitchen) Daisy that washing up is not gunna do itself! and Yas it doesn’t sound like you’re doing much work either!

DAISY: (Rolls eyes)Coming! Yeah check it out on facebook when you get a chance.

Yasmin sighs and carries on wiping down the bar.

CUT TO:

INT: STAFF ROOM - MIDDAY

Yasmin and Daisy Sit down to lunch

YAS: Hey have you applied for that job yet? (Continues to eat)

DAISY: The one in Bath? Nah they’ve already filled the position. (Picks up Sandwich)

YASMIN: What about the one in Clarks, I know its not the best job in the world but it’s better pay and we can’t stay here forever.

DAISY: Yeah but Tim’s working there now.

YASMIN: You guys still not talking?

DAISY: not really, it’s just too awkward, I can’t be working 9 to 5 next to a guy I spent a year of my life with.  That would be enough emotional distress to put me in the loony bin with that weirdo from the bench.

YASMIN: Ha-ha you still going on about that? He was probably just waiting for someone. I’m starting to think you’re the crazy one.

DAISY: Might explain why I enjoy your company.

Character Description

For each of the fictional characters featured in my short film I thin k it is important to get a brief description of each one to help me find my actors and continue with my script and storyboard.

I decided to collect a few key words to describe each character with a brief synopsis of their personality.

YASMIN

• Caring
• Calm
• Mature

I want Yasmin to come across as a conscientious, warm and nurturing character. I want to portray her as more down to earth and empathetic than Daisy the sympathy towards the Mystery Man in this story is key to the development so it's important to incorporate that into the representation of this character.

DAISY

• Juvenile
• Excitable
• Extrovert

I'm aiming to depict Daisy as a stereotypical girl of that age, outgoing, loud, lazy, self involved but fun and lovable. I think it's important that Yasmin's character provides an almost maternal figure to Daisy in this story as it helps to highlight her immaturity and explain why she finds the incident entertaining rather than sympathizing with the Mystery Man.

MYSTERY MAN

• Quiet
• Absent
• Lonely

I am determined to release as little information or sign of any personality to this character as the more illusive he seems the more of an opportunity for the audience to make their own assumptions on where he is from, why he is there and who he really is. The only character points I want to illustrate about this man is how unusual he appears to be with subtle hints of sadness and melancholy. The last scene will prove the character to be thoughtful and appreciative of Yasmin's kind gesture as well as creating more mystery surrounding the character.

Tagline

To create a tagline I decided to search popular taglines from other films online and found a site with a list of
'66 great film taglines from the past 30 years'

66 great movie taglines from the past 30 years

Here are a few examples of taglines from films of separate genres.

Taglines

• Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1988) - "One man's struggle to take it easy"
• Alien Vs Predator (2004)- "Whoever wins, We lose"
• The Fly (1986) - "Be afraid, Be very afraid"
• Grosse Point Blank (1997) "Every hit man deserves a second shot"
• Platoon (1986) "The first casualty of war is innocence"
• Schindler's List (1993) "The list is life"

Taglines are a sentence to draw an audience into watching a film. Puns, jokes and repetition are all popular tools used for a successful tagline and by using my examples of taglines coming up with my own shouldn't be too difficult.

My Tagline

"One man, One day, One memorable encounter."